So this morning I was scrolling through my daily horoscope app like always, totally skeptical but kinda curious you know? Saw October’s Taurus forecast had some “life-changing tips” and thought okay fine, let’s put this to the test for real. Grabbed my notebook, fresh coffee, and decided to try every single thing they said. Here’s exactly how it went down, step by dirty step.
Tip 1: “Secure Your Foundation First Thing Monday Morning”
Right. Rolled outta bed Monday groaning ’cause who wants to adult that hard? But hey, the stars said “secure your foundation,” so I figured that meant my messy apartment. Spent two hours doing crap I normally avoid:
- Dusted my desk – Found three missing pens and a stale bagel under paperwork.
- Paid overdue bills – Ugh. Logged into my bank app, winced at my balance, paid rent and that scary electric bill. Felt oddly lighter afterwards, gotta admit.
- Made a budget tracker – Scribbled income vs expenses on a notepad like it’s 1999. Highlighted “NO UBER EATS” in angry red marker.
Tip 2: “Embrace Sensual Pleasures on Wednesday”
Okay Taurus loves luxury, so Wednesday I went full indulgence mode:
- Cancelled my boring Zoom lunch – Told ’em my internet died. Fight me.
- Lit that expensive candle – You know, the one I’ve been “saving for special”? Yeah, Wednesday became special. Smelled like vanilla and poor choices.
- Ate real food off fancy plates – Microwaved lasagna but put it on my grandma’s china. Used a cloth napkin. Felt ridiculous until the first bite. Suddenly? Pure bliss.
Tip 3: “Invest in Stability Before Month-End”
Panicked Friday realizing the “stability” tip meant MONEY. Taurus = bull = stubborn = probably saving. Fine!
- Transferred $50 to savings – Barely enough for tacos but hey, future me might thank past me. Maybe.
- Researched that career cert – YouTubed free courses for an hour. Fell down a rabbit hole about Excel macros. Progress, I guess?
- Watered my dying houseplant – Figured green stuff counts as “stable foundation.” Named it Rocky. We’re both survivors now.
Did Any Of This Actually Work?
Surprisingly? Kinda. Paying bills sucked but erased that low-key dread humming in my brain all week. Burning the dumb candle made Wednesday feel sacred instead of suffocating. And moving $50 made me feel like a tiny adult instead of a raccoon wearing sweatpants. Taurus wasn’t wrong – October feels… steadier. Still broke though. Some cosmic rules remain.
